I hereby proclaim that I do not consider myself as a gamer anymore.

I am no longer a gamer, at least based on a real gamer's standards.

I used to be very competitive when playing games, be it console or computer gaming. I play to be really good. I play to kick ass. "Career" mode, as they call it.

I used to have a great time with Mr. Frost kicking ass on our favorite online game. We would play for hours, being in the same party, helping each other complete quests or power level.

I can still remember how my temper would rise up when I can't complete a crash course in Burnout 3. Or when I can't get past an AI opponent in Soul Calibur 3. Or when I'm stuck in God of War 2. I wouldn't stop until I achieve my goal, which is to win or finish the game.

When I gave birth to Issen, I thanked heavens for the invention of nursing pillows, specifically My Brest Friend. I could keep on playing PS2 or computer games even while breastfeeding my baby. "Look, Ma! No hands!" had a new meaning to me.

Now, I just play to relax and enjoy what little "me" time that I have. I didn't really lose interest. I can't really say that becoming a parent does to you, because I know a lot of parents who are still playing as hard as they did when their bundles of joys were not existent yet. Priorities and perspective probably just changed.

Instead of playing, I'd rather write for my blog most of the time. Instead of checking out game sites to keep myself updated with new game releases, I'd rather read blogs in my network or check out baby sites for tips on child caring.

I still play, though. Currently, I'm playing Guitar Hero III while waiting for Kobe's fashionably late grand entrance. I finished the Easy Career mode in two days. Since I just started playing the damned game when my maternity leave started (I kept putting off playing it because I'm afraid I might get addicted and won't be able to concentrate at work), I think getting no lower than 3 stars is remarkable. I'm getting better, though, but I haven't moved on to Medium mode. It's too damn hard for my temper.

So right now, I'm trying to enjoy the game and the music on Easy mode, trying to get 5 stars for each number.

Yep, I'm still playing. Not as hard as before, but I'm still playing.

Does that still make me a gamer?

Labels: about me, gaming